Listening To:too tired for music

Reading:the bible of Tim

Wishing:for sweet, sweet sleep

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Sunday, Nov. 09, 2003 - 12:15 a.m.
Oh, Mighty Tim!

I�m tired, and I couldn�t sleep so I came back here to post a little.

Head office came by a few days ago. We had to change everything around. Why? Because they are Gods to us and they don�t have to work there. We must obey.

Imagine a deep, rumbly voice� like James Earl Jones or something.

In the beginning, there was Store Number One.

It was opened, and the Mighty Tim saw that it was good. �Be fruitful and multiply�, he said to his disciples.

And so they went forth into the world, and multiplied and spread the word of Tim, and Tim saw that this was good. And each new store had an owner, who became Tim�s disciple, and each disciple was told to spread the word of Tim.

And Mighty Tim saw that his disciples spread the word, and was well pleased.

And then Tim decreed, the coffee must never sit beyond twenty minutes, for twenty is the number which is correct and fresh, and twenty is the number which pleaseth Tim.

All donuts must lie in the basket, leaning left, no more than three to a row, for three is the number which is pleasing to the eye, and left is the direction in which they shall lean, for left is pleasing to the eyes of Tim.

And then the messenger of Tim appeared unto the acolytes, and he spoke to them thus:

�Thou shalt not become complacent in thy work, for we shall appear randomly and arbitrarily move things around and change your donut display so you cannot find things quickly. Such is the will of Tim, and such is the law you must obey. Thou shalt take these cans of coffee and stick them all into the little window in the counter, and thou shalt remove all the boxes which we previously told you to place upon the bottom of the donut display, for boxes along the bottom are no longer pleasing to Tim. Thou shalt follow this neat little chart, and rip the entire display apart and rearrange it in the middle of the sacred delivery of goods, for Tim wills it.�

Yeah. Next they�ll be telling us to make burnt offerings of those damn bread bowls on an altar made of stainless steel.

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